Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death, those who love it will eat its fruit."

So, I have to get something off my chest or I might die. I have a friend, who shall remain unnamed - not that she even reads my blog, but anyway! I invited her to a bible study, and was SO excited that she was going with me and getting a lot out of it. Like, a lot. Everything was going along just fine until someone said something that bothered her. And now she's not going anymore. When you have a friend and there is something you share together and then it ends it's so sad. I keep hoping she'll change her mind, but it doesn't look like it's going to happen.
The thing is, in the setting we were in I felt like we should ALL be free to share our feelings. Even if it could offend someone. But, the thing is the more I think about it the more I know that can't be true. My mom always said "think before you speak". Mostly because I'd say (and still do) whatever came to mind at whatever time. Sometimes that is inappropriate, hurtful, rude, any number of things really.
I kept thinking of this verse tonight from Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death, those who love it will eat its fruit." What we say can be hurtful not only to others but to ourselves. This could be a comment, a lie, gossip, a rude joke.....so many negative things. But, it can also give life - we can give compliments, encourage one another, lift up, speak the truth. We can also refrain from any and all. Sometimes that is the best thing to do.
The comment that came out killed that relationship, she will no longer go to bible study. And her experience is tainted by one little thing. The ripple effect of that comment is felt by all of us even though only one person said it. At the end of the verse, those who love it will eat its fruit.....that's scary. It doesn't say the fruit will taste good. It could be bitter. One statement could ruin a relationship and cause lonliness. Or distrust, or fear, or make you the laughingstock of cruelty.
How much better to let the things that we say build people up so that the fruit we eat is sweet? That is what I aspire to, even though I miss the mark repeatedly. I struggle with gossip and just complaining. I need to think - if that person walked up would they be glad to hear what I've said about them?

No comments: