cake and table

Okay, wanna see something delicious? Boom There you go.  These, friends, are miniature pineapple upside down cakes.  I forgot the cherries on top, but they were no less delish.  A few years ago, my Mom had gotten this book, The Gentle Art of Domesticity by Jane Brocket.  In the book there is a little section about pineapples and she had bought this pan that as soon as I saw it I knew I had to have it.  Except that I never could bring myself to buy the pan. Why?  Idk, $25 for a cake pan that I had never even tried the cake seemed a little frivolous.  It still does but after Scott died I bought it, he always encouraged me to get whatever I wanted and I figured I could use the cheeriness of a cute little cake.  I tried this recipe except for the ground almonds I used almond flavoring because I'm allergic to almonds.  It turned out ah-mazing!  So, so good.

So, I'm living in a house that I never thought I'd be staying in for very long so I haven't really decorated or unpacked boxes.  Now, I realize I will be here awhile.  I really wanted a gateleg table for the kitchen because I like the openess of the kitchen but also need a table so if I have people over for dinner.  I didn't exactly find a gateleg table but I did find a really cute little table with drop leaves, and it's white so perfect. side view:
It fits perfectly in that little nook area and I have the chairs in another room to cut down on clutter and then when I need them I can just bring them out.  You can see Rocky's back in the top photo.  The pups are always so curious when I'm taking photos.

So, yesterday being Memorial Day I drove over to the cemetery.  I always used to tell Scott "happy Memorial Day" or "happy Veteran's Day" because he had been in the Army and I know he appreciated being acknowledged that way.  It was so beautiful, they had put a flag on every single grave so the hillside was covered with flags!  I didn't know that they would do that so I hadn't brought my camera.  As Jan likes to remind me, if I had a cell phone I could've gotten a picture. 

Last week was really tough.  Ups and downs.  Started out with my dryer breaking, the lawn mower was broken.  Then both got fixed.  I almost feel like the cloud of shock I've been in is starting to lift and there's more pain as realization sets in.  I feel like an empty shell, almost like just sleepwalking or something.  I don't know how to explain the strangeness and pain at the same time.  I miss him so much.